I should have walked away when I had the chance. I don't want to do this. I don't want to be clingy and get attached and end up hurt. I can't do that again to myself, and on the flip side, I can't do that to her. I warned her that I'd get clingy and it didn't scare her away but I'm afraid I'm going to need her more than she realizes, and I'm going to be more than she can handle. I don't want to do that to someone.

It's not fair, now. She didn't do anything wrong. I didn't do anything wrong. Or maybe I did, because I didn't push hard enough away and maybe it is her fault for pushing and not giving up when I pushed away because I knew it'd be better.

Maybe if I'd never caved, she'd just be someone I'd get over in a couple weeks or something. But it's her fault for pushing. And my fault for letting her in. It's just going to end in disaster for me. I'm too much for her right now and I don't want to need her. I saw her on Thursday. THURSDAY. TWO AND A HALF DAYS AGO. And I'm already fretting and being like, "oh my god what am I going to do for the next seven weeks?" Maybe it's the non-answered Facebook request that is driving me insane.

Maybe I need to cancel the request and forget about her.